i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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