Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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