is your mom at the bar?
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
