Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
