I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
