i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
