I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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