if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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