everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
