U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
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Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Can I color on your dick again?
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Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
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He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.