Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion

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  (215): I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion http://tfl.nu/gpfj
  Replies (68) Good night (4579) Bad night (618) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"

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  (619): dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober" http://tfl.nu/5gad
  Replies (61) Good night (2976) Bad night (581) Order T-Shirt
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  (325): View more from Texas

  Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?

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  (325): Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis? http://tfl.nu/utwq
  Replies (152) Good night (650) Bad night (5354) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"

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  (860): You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW" http://tfl.nu/b6ij
  Replies (17) Good night (5786) Bad night (610) Order T-Shirt
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.

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  (204): between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight. http://tfl.nu/u2b0
  Replies (28) Good night (890) Bad night (4524) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do

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  (920): Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do http://tfl.nu/w5tc
  Replies (12) Good night (488) Bad night (5770) Order T-Shirt
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.

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  (204): Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever. http://tfl.nu/wklp
  Replies (28) Good night (5469) Bad night (1363) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.

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  (410): There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to. http://tfl.nu/sxdr
  Replies (17) Good night (1156) Bad night (5603) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.

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  (917): My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table. http://tfl.nu/qx0a
  Replies (4) Good night (3931) Bad night (702) Order T-Shirt
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.

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  (414): Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/gfee
  Replies (6) Good night (662) Bad night (1576)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch

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  (206): before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch http://tfl.nu/cp10
  Replies (14) Good night (1939) Bad night (625) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.

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  (951): I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting. http://tfl.nu/326h
  Replies (6) Good night (1753) Bad night (577) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes

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  (610): I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes http://tfl.nu/kawt
  Replies (4) Good night (981) Bad night (424) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.

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  (479): I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk. http://tfl.nu/vgj4
  Replies (7) Good night (1031) Bad night (241) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?

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  (828): Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis? http://tfl.nu/tjmy
  Replies (12) Good night (742) Bad night (165) Order T-Shirt

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