He kissed a someone with a penis
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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