I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize