why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
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