You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
