I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
