you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
