He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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