Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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