I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
