have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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