he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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