Who wears a wallet chain?!
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do flat chested girls get laid?
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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