Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
