Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
