Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
