She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize