last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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