Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
