her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
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You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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