Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Randomize
