Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize