He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
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