I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
