we're blogging at a bar
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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