D3 body, D1 cock
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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