After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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