i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Randomize
