I'm really into asian looking animals
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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