He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
