Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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