Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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