plz talk dirty to me
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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