I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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