So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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