i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
