How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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