When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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