Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
