So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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