What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize
